There was a scandal in Forest Hill!
I was driving home from the supermarket and I turned into the road that led to Forest Hill (the village where I live). And, to my utmost horror, I noticed that some rapscallion had vandalised the village sign so that it read 'Honest Pills'. Someone needed a bloody good cuff around the ear.
Pic.No.1. Some young rascal had been at work on the village sign
But then I started wondering why someone would want to change the sign to read 'Honest Pills'? So I decided to do a bit of digging (yeh, yeh, I've got too much time on my hands). What I discovered belied Forest Hill's sleepy village facade.... oh yes, I found a murky history.
Rewind back to 1991, when dance music was all the rage, and saucer-eyed, middle class, twenty-somethings were radicalising the dance scene by tuning into 'underground' DJ mixes (I am not exactly sure why they were 'underground', because they were never banned in the first place), and hanging out with travellers. But why travellers? Because travellers had dreadlocks dude, and they lived in converted ambulances; so they had to be leading the revolution. And what better way to start a revolution than initiating a trend for tattooed celtic bands?
Against this backdrop, apparently Forest Hill was home to two enormous illegal raves which gave it cult status ..... hence the sign's reference to 'pills'. I even managed to find a Youtube clip of one of the DJs (Easygroove) who played that night, and a photograph of him performing at the very same rave.
Impressed? My middle names should be Due Diligence for chrissake! Actually no, that would be a bad idea because it would mean that my initials would be ADDD. And people would probably start calling me Dr. Alliteration, thinking that they were being witty, and not realising that I had pre-empted them. And I would have to do a polite laugh to appreciate their joke, which is a bad thing because I am rubbish at polite laughing. I sound like a dobbin crossed with a donkey.
Pic.No.2. Easygroove's set at the illegal Forest Hill rave
So there you go folks. History has revealed that there was more to the Forest Hill social scene than the Women's Intitute's annual cake making bonanza. Umm, I wonder.... how many of the illegal ravers are now respectable Forest Hill inhabitants? Actually, I am not going to wonder about it here; I have a sneaky feeling it might be one of those things that gets me into trouble.
Pic.No.3. The Flyer advertising the Forest Hill rave - someone drew that by hand! How retro is that? That's the olden days, that is
P.S. As a complete aside, I was researching 'Celtic Band Tattoos' and Google chucked all manner of random tattoo images at me. I thought that you might like to see three of my favourite crap tattoos ...... (not that I spent ages looking at them or anything.... actually I can't back that up).
Pic.No.4. Can you imagine... the romance was going well, she was kissing his ear and lightly panting as she slowly unbuttoned his shirt ..... only to be confronted with ..... holy shit! There is a dead person coming out of your chest!
Pic.No.5. I wondered where I had left my Tweenies keyring
But my all-time favourite crap tattoo is this one........ I have never seen anything so lame in my life. At what point did he shout at the tattooist - "THAT'S IT! That's the emblem that I want permanently etched upon my skin! Don't even think about changing anything!"
Pic.No.6. My all-time favourite tattoo
P.P.S. Sorry, I seem to have got a bit sidetracked with tattoos. So I challenge you to two things: (1) can you produce a bigger 'village scandal' than an illegal rave; and (2) can you find a crapper tattoo than the ones I found? Aha..... that's got ya!
I love 'rapscallion' fab word ... in fact I'm making it word of teh day... henceforth Jody & Gary are rapscallions :)
ReplyDeleteYou would make a bloody great rapscallion!
ReplyDeleteI live in a small rural town of Carlisle, MA, USA. Population 5,000... The local police found a very robust pot plant growing in a container at the end of a street. The local newspaper police log listed the find asking the owner to come to the station to claim the plant. I found this quite humorous, especially because the large majority of townspeople take the position "see no evil, speak no evil, hear no evil".
ReplyDeleteAll small, sleepy, rural towns have a darker side. Nothing wrong with a little darkness!
Vandalism is another thing. The village sign incident is certainly vandalism.
Another local incident involved a prank where one home used red Christmas lights to decorate their property and the house across the street used white lights --- and you guessed it, in the darkness of the night a few pranksters switched the lights. Presto!
Many years ago when my brother was a budding chemist, my parents gave him (you guessed it) a junior chemistry set. My brother and his friend made an explosive and set it in a street sewer in our village. Upon detination the sewer cap flew off landing in my parent's garden. The sound of the explosion brought the police and fire department and ultimately the removal of the chemistry set.
Susan
I rather like your village's torrid past. Who would've thought? I still think the rapscallion who defaced the sign needs a good boxing about the ears!
ReplyDeleteLMAO - I laffed my fool head off "I sound like a dobbin crossed with a donkey. " Too damned funny!
ReplyDeleteOn the other hand, the whole Dr. ADDD thing...they might just think you over achieving person with ADD. *shrug*
I got nuthin' on the other stuff because I'm so tired that my one computer has progressed from 1, to 3, to 15...pretty sure sleep should be on my not to distant horizon providing a tornado doesn't blow me away tonight.
I do have to say though that last crap-tastic tattoo picture that you posted...it looks like a cat that ate rotten meat that it couldn't smell first and is trying to decide if it wants to puke or cry for it's mommy. Any note...it's one sad effin' tattoo.
xo
Hello Susan, thanks for stopping by. Blimey, your village sounds a bit rad - what with all those marijuana plants being grown. It makes our rave sound quite tame!
ReplyDeleteLoved your stories about the light swapping and chemistry set! I am always amused by high jinx!!!
Hi Jayne, couldn't agree more. A bloody boxing would be perfect... if the police had caught whoever did it!
ReplyDeleteJewell! How ya doing me homey? What you thinking of looking at crap tattooes on my blog when you are that tired eh?
ReplyDeleteI don't know what it is about that last tattoo, but it really tickles my sense of humour. I think it is the ears that does it.
Jesus, that guy in Pic 5? He's not taking his holidays on the Costa Blanca, is he?
ReplyDeleteADDD: Attention Deficit Disorder Dickens.
Jane Kirikmaa: Saw a bloke today in peacocks (times are hard!) with tatts all over his face, I had to do a double take cos I thought hed been in a punch up, what baffled me was that nobody else batted an eye lid (no kids screaming and pointing)! That's scotland for you!
ReplyDeleteHey there girlfriend! =) Feeling much better now that I got a little sleep. Not nearly enough, but my body can only stand being in bed so long...so need some more. Definitely can't sleep my days away like I did as a kid! =) *snicker*
ReplyDeleteWell I was going to have to stay awake last night anyway...we had some nasty weather rolling in so on top of having to be jerked awake waaaaay too freakin' early in the morning by the alarm then didn't get to bed until 2 am when I was sure I wasn't going get carried off to the land of Oz by tornado like Dorothy. =) So, reading your blog was an excellent way to help me keep awake! =)
As for the tattoo...I would have to say that for me it was the eyes...they were pathetic excuses... =)
luv ya xo
.
ReplyDeleteAccording to this here article in the ever reliable never untruthful Daily Faily (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1333590/Queens-friend-calls-police-stop-people-having-outdoor-sex-estate.html), the area around Forest Hill is used for dogging and cottaging. Hmmm... (wonders what Annie gets up to on the weekend...)
ReplyDeleteGod yeh, I read the same article. Apparently the layby at the end of the village is the scene of much dogging and illicit gay sex. Who says that living in the country isn't rock and roll?
ReplyDelete*sigh* I never made it to the Forest Hill rave, but I do recall seeing all the appropriately dressed yoof's heading up there in the evening. I suspect I had responsible things to do with my night, like revise for my GCSE's or something. What a rip-off!
ReplyDeleteOOOH, are you a local then? How exciting that you witnessed it - shame you couldn't make it.
ReplyDelete_____