Monday, 26 December 2011

The countdown to Christmas

'Where in the blazes have you been?' I hear you cry, 'you don't call me, you don't send me flowers .....'

I know, I know. I have been utterly crap at blogging the last few weeks, but that is because the crazy red mist that is Christmas has descended upon me. One minute I was bumbling along quite happily, surviving on Pot Noodles, takeaway pizza, and marmite on toast, and then BOOM, Christmas arrived and everything turned to rat shit.

All of a sudden, you have to find time to do things for other people, like buy them food and presents, which is nowhere near as much fun as buying stuff for yourself.

Plus, I detest shopping, so that part of Christmas (and a part that increasing year on year) is a bit of a chore. However, after finishing the shopping for my friends, it became clear that I needed to tackle Izzy's presents. Luckly, she had written a letter to Santa to help me out. But it wasn't long before I realised that it looked nothing like the lists that I would write to Santa in my youth, for example  ...........

1 Orange
1 Walnut
Some Marbles
A Wooden Spinning Top 

Whereas Izzy's list contained bizarre things like ...................

Fur Real Cookie Pup
Harry Potter School
Light Up Zooble
Ice Cream Maker

Trying to figure out exactly what it was that she wanted, was like decipering bloody Latin. Luckily I had arranged to go shopping with Steve (we buy all her presents together - it's easier), so at least I had back up when it came to selecting the right items.

We had arranged to go to the store of doom - Toys R Us - most hideous place on the planet. Everything within its confines is made from garish plastic, and the staff have all been recruited from Apathetic R Us, and look slightly grubby.

And because I am kind, I have got some photographs for you .......

 Pic.No.1 That's me shopping that is. Seeing me shopping is like encountering a Yeti

Pic.No.2 This is Steve ...... we were dazed and confused

Pic.No.3 And flailing around in the 'girls aisle' like an Octopus on a slab of concrete

Pic.No.3 But then we found a comedy toy - can you believe that people would actually buy their child plastic 'chicken nuggets and fries' for Christmas? So much for promoting healthy living

Pic.No.4 You will be pleased to hear that after several hours of scouring the shelves, we finally concluded that we had successfully acquired the items on Izzy's letter to Santa. Look you can see a princess dress in the trolley .... sssssshhhhh don't tell her what we have bought

Pic.No. 5 Then after a strenuous day of shopping, we decided to celebtate by picking Izzy up from her friends house and eating out at a new Turkish restaurant on the Cowley Road. It was called 'Oxford's Grill'

Pic.No.6 Look! It's me and Izzy looking natural in the Oxford's Grill

Pic.No. 7 Steve stuck a toothpick up his nose for comedy effect

Pic.No.8 And here is a picture of my meal - it was a lamb dish and it was super tasty

So all in all, it was a very successful day preparing for Christmas. How about you dahlink - did you hit the big day on top of all the preparations?

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