Pic.No.1. A hapless pheasant
I feel sorry for pheasants at the best of times. They epitomise stupidity in that they have a acute lack of awareness with regards to what will kill them. If you were to plonk one of them in the middle of a road, and then drive a juggernaut at it really slowly (giving it plenty of time to escape), it would just stay put and get run over.
The stupidity of pheasants got me thinking about shooting parties. Surely choosing a bird that stupid as your prey, doesn't require much skill? I mean it would just sit staring at you whilst you shot it point blank. Why not choose something a bit more challenging, like a humming bird, to really demonstrate your gun skills? [Note to reader: I'm not advocating the mass killing of humming birds, merely using the subject as a discussion point. In fact, if the truth be known, I am completely against the killing of any animals in the name of 'sport'. It always seems to be terribly biased in favour of the person hiding in a tree with a gun, as opposed to the unsuspecting prey in their sights.].
Anyway, back to the shooting party. I had no idea what they are shooting the pheasants with, but it sounded like they were using missiles. The whole weekend has been interspersed with god almighty bangs, and unfortunately, Naughty George doesn't like sound of explosions one bit. I don't know whether he had a bad experience with a Surface-to-Air when he was a puppy, but I did know that louds bangs terrified him.
Pic.No.2. Naughty George was not happy at all
So, it's not just the pheasants who were having a bad day; Naughty George was panting and shaking like the Queen on a walkabout, refusing to leave my side. It was like bonfire night, except this time it went on for two days. Ahhh..... the joys of living in the countryside.
You will be pleased to know that the bangs have now stopped, and peace has resumed once more. I can hear the birds singing and the sun is out. And more importantly, I am really glad I'm not a pheasant because it would take have taken me ages to type this post.
12 comments:
Awww, I feel sorry for NG. Not for peasants though. Nor pheasants.
I'd never thought of pheasants as stupid. Are they like the bird equivalent of sheep, then?
Hiya Bren... yep NG gets it pretty bad when there is loud bangs. You gotta feel sorry for the Pheasants though...can be fun being shot at by the landed gentry!
Hiya Fran! Yep, I think that pheasants are the bird equivalent of sheep. Mind you I haven't done much research on them.... maybe they aren't as stupid as I thought.... time to do a bit of Pheasant research methinks.
My dad plucks pheasants for a living*.
It never appealed to me though.
That's why I'm not a pheasant plucker, I'm a pheasant plucker's son.
* may contain traces of lie
Can we give the pheasants something to shoot back with? You know...make it a fair fight - just asking.
Been on a few shoots myself, both beating (making alarming noises to drive the pheasants up and out and into the path of the guns) and shooting. Great day out, large rural industry - parting with 500 nicker for a few hours tally-bloody-ho may seem quite steep if you're not that way inclined - and a managed countryside resource. In my experience all the shot birds are consumed.
And one unfortunate Sunday about 17 years ago I too enjoyed the role of the pheasant when that drunken bastard Reverend Phil put some buck into my shoulder whilst trying to drink, eat and shoot simultaneously.
Hey Ron, I am not sure that giving weaponry to Pheasants is a good thing... they really are stupid.
Bruce that was bloody funny (aside from the fact you got shot) - the bit about the drunken bastard Reverend Phil made me laugh out loud!
George (I left the 'Naughty' off when I owned him – it was obvious) has always been bad with bangs. Fireworks night would have him hiding under chairs or tables, trembling.
Hiya Ed! Nice to hear from you... Is it me or does it seem like donkey's years ago since you owned NG? Wasn't it when we were just out of uni? Blimey. You'll be pleased to know that he is going strong, even though as you said... he is bad with bangs.
[note for readers: Ed used to own Naughty George before he was given to me]
Must have been around '98. I used to take him to work on the tube as a puppy. He'd be curled up a asleep inside my coat. Then he'd be naughty in the office. Got some photos of him as a puppy somewhere.
Post a Comment