"A man who walks with the animals, talks with the animals........"
Do you remember that I nearly got killed by a herd of killer cows not so long ago? (Here is the blog archive). Well not any more..... I tamed 'em......... yep, just like that.
As I strode across the field with Naughty George, I spotted my favourite cow, Stripey Face, who promptly started stalking me again.
'I refuse to face near death everytime I walk my mutt,' I thought, and decided that drastic action was needed.
'Ummmm, what's a girl to do?' I pondered as Stripey Face edged closer followed by a killer flock of cows.
'That's it,' I thought in an Eureka moment, 'I am going to have a face-off with that cow.'
"Stripey Face, come here!" I shouted, "I'm not scared of you!"
Stripey face edged forward and sure enough stopped dead in his tracks and looked startled that his 'victim' wasn't moving. He looked even more bemused by the fact that aforementioned 'victim' was attempting snake-charming moves (that involves waving your hand slowly in front of an animals eyes) to try and hypnotise him.
Stripey Face was frozen to the spot, and I was getting confident.
"Nice ear-rings," I said trying to flatter him into submission. And would you believe it? It worked! Stripey Face looked coy and edged forward slightly.
In a beautiful human / cow bonding moment I stretched my hand out and Stripey Face stuck out his tongue.
"Ugh, you are not touching me with that manky looking thing," I said recoiling quickly, and here endeth the tale about how a furniture wholesaler tamed a herd of cows.