After all the facebook activity that recently popped up in various inboxes, I made an educated guess that Phil and Becks had uploaded their latest snowboarding pictures.
So, I thought that it would be the perfect time to update you on their shenanigans.
At the beginning of the week, it appeared that things weren't going that well, with Becks trying to lead a party of snowboarders uphill, forgetting that gravity and momentum generally favour downhill when it comes to boarding.
Finally, they cottoned-on to the benefits of 'downhill' snowboarding and promptly crashed en-masse. The only quote that springs to mind is one from Reeves and Mortimer; "Vic I've fallen, and I think it's really bad!" It is man-in-black who gives the game away - he is clearly looking at the camera to try and gauge how 'good' his crash looks on film.
After going to a local eaterie to try and recover from the pandemonium of the crash, Becks realised that her false teeth had fallen out and being the opportunist that she is, decided to try and profit from her woe; "gurning contest anybody?"
Obviously, no-one wanted to hang out with a girlie with no teeth, so Becks was promptly removed from the eaterie by a gang of chaps supervised by 'PG Tips man' who is looking very sinister and is located far-right.
"Maverick, you just did an incredibly brave thing. But what you should have done was land your plane! You don't own that plane, the tax payers do! Son, your ego is writing checks your body can't cash"
More dead seals found along the Caspian Coast of Kazakhstan.
Becks was going so slowly that the ice gradually crept in and locked her into position.
P.S. she had to be carried 'whole' to a nearby hotel in order to thaw out in a bath.